Nicky at Spot.

I am Silly

2011-07-09T20:38:00.001+08:00

continue where we stopped.

It's already 3 mths since that time I didnt blog. If to hv calculated I still have 5 more mths before letting everything go for better good. And by now I should have someone besides me but Im not. Then a random question usually I asked him is "do u hv bf already?". Kind of silly when asked him about this but I starts to felt tiring of waiting in silent. Make me sometimes stay in a position with no moving to left or to right. If only you have answered me, I might be a free bird, or tame bird.

Innocent part 2 ?

2011-04-08T01:05:00.002+08:00

continue where we stopped.

Innocent is part of me. No matter how I tried to shake it off, it will still be part of me. But because of It I learned few things. Sometimes lines must drawn clearly for unintentionally mistaken by others. Secondly, words should be loud and clear without unintentionally meaning behind. And lastly be speak with a mind and emotion not emotion follow by mind.

One pretty shocking thing that, I will be going MP this saturday. I do admitted it that last time I told, I wasnt like clubbing in gay club than straight club. But this time may be an exception for me to try out. I hope MP is better and won't let me down from my expectation. Even though I had been clubbing like twice. Twice in same place, Zouk where last week I went there again. The atmosphere is still there. Beating, the music, mix tune, dance, the gals, the guys and the alcohol. The last time I went same as this week sore throat, nose blocked, and on and off fever. And worst come to worst, Monday have exam. Sunday pretty much awake whole day couldn't sleep because sun raise till my feet and mental drained from alcohol for it no time to revise. Mentally have to prepare " What if happen" when explore to other the side.

All in one.

2011-03-08T20:37:00.002+08:00

continue where we stopped.

January.

I dont remember when was the exact time for this. On weekend went out for lunch with Will.I.am, SK and Jase ( new guy?). Amazingly this is my second time to meet Will.i.am and SK but first time meet Jase at Little Korea, Solaris Mont Kiara. Will.i.am use one stone to kill two bird since Jase and I stayed somewhere there else well. :P. I was shy and timid because next to me was Jase and opposite is Will.i.am while SK facing Jase. Jase is quite big and build. And he got dashing voice. wakaka. After lunch, we went to Plaza Damas but overhead they wanted to find "Rambo" or "Rainbow" tapi exact location tak tahu. Some window shopping. Then Starbuck. I've mocha blender . Asked Will.i.am for tasting but he didn't like it because the whipped cream so much could make him puke (thanks of dave deli?) :P. Then saw few lengchai 3 or 4 tables away.

they in short pants and tights almost the dick cant breathe ? Some even are hunky dorky. Immediately they're Gay. After the nice view, we went to Jase's house. I had a delicious chocolate by Jase ( Thanks ). Then I had 2nd tasting again. I was fed either by SK or Jase. Will.i.am wont suap anyone beside his lover. jk.:P. So it was SK. hahaha. Then we called it a day.

February

This time was abit different the person I meet. He doesn't have a blog. Just owned a Facebook (FB). I wasn't sure how this guy had my Facebook account. At first I thought this guy just a FB gamer, but later saw the mutual friends I've got. Confirmed he's GAY. Geezz.

If I still remember last few months ago, he (bluesky) wants a meet up with Will.i.am and I but I kept turn down on him for times. hahahaha.:P. Kind scare meet a guy who you never see any pictures. Therefore a bargain was traded. I managed overlook his real picture.( Quite different from it.) Then I arranged a meet up at SS2 this month after Lunar New Year. Supposed to be three some but Will.i.am couldn't make it. Geez. Came to be like dating. I was entirely silly in front of him like a village boy meeting with city guy. I think Will.i.am describe him quite precisely after he meet bluesky. Few more adds. Attractive eyes. Improper shave facial hair?. Too bad couldnt show the body of his. :PPP. He is interesting guy to chat with. After the meal, he drove me back. So good of him.;).

FYI, I was right on time that day. Thank goodness I didnt late. HOHOHOHOHO

Pathetic.

2011-03-08T00:57:00.001+08:00

Yesterday(sunday) I went to PC Expo to buy external hard drive, because mom wants it. So I went alone. Thought of asking companion but couldnt get through. Then a call came in. She couldn't make it. Then saying I'm pathetic go shopping alone and don't ask others to accompany. Actually I'm quite comfortable shopping alone I told her. Even a friend works there said the same like her. Pathetic. I don't really minded what they said because this are really friends. Hard to find this kind of friends who true to themselves. To see they laughed and happy and smile, I'm jolted alive. Because of that I couldn't remember why I was emo-ing yesterday.

Suddenly I had thought of how pathetic of those emo-ing people was. Really pathetic. They've got great friends around whenever they needed or in any occasion. Yet so damn emo-idiotic. If sometimes, I can practically understand. But every time, just couldn't stand. Sometimes just don't want be so judgemental about all this. Wanna let it be and move on. But then want go in front of them, tell to cry last tears out, and stand up like a true gentlemen or women. Walk with faith.

Now I'm really pathetic. Don't know how to express my feeling. GEEZZZ

Share.

2011-02-19T15:40:00.002+08:00

Just wanna share something like videos, music, ebooks where all collectively came from groups google. All are non porn of course. But sometimes you will find gay movies like boy culture, eating out, permanent residence, etc. So as songs and albums. If you have gmail then subcribe. They will email you everyday.

Here.
Here.

Thank you.

The reason

2011-02-19T00:40:00.002+08:00

continue where we stopped.

Some days passed. Then I remembered, I was invited by Takashi a.k.a Pluboy to his birthday party bash few day before the actually date. I have the courtesy wanna to attend but couldn't promise will make it.

As days passed by, the actual day's arrived. It was nerve wracking yet simultaneously felt timid

by the fact of first time visiting his home and celebrating first gay friend's birthday. But I've got many crossed my mind.

I was worried for a particular person might there. Worries might create tension atmosphere between us and an awkward moments. At the same time don't want ruin his party. But then I was backed home late about 8 0r 9 pm something.

And sent apology SMS. After few days, I saw few pictures of him. The instinct always there.

The reason sang by Hoobstank.

Ah Wong

2011-02-17T22:45:00.004+08:00

continue where we stopped.

I dont where to begin with. May be begin from before Lunar New Year. I was thinking shopping at New Wing 1Utama (1U) for new year clothes because everything is on sales. Then thinking for companion. So I called the sabahan. That day was weekend and 3 something pm. I drove all the way to find him then head to 1U. It wasn't fully packed but still, it is family day. Then shop by shops we stopped. Padini, Pull and Bear, Bosani, etc. I couldn't manage to decide which to buy so we stopped by A&W for dinning. As we having our meals, a gay couple came in, he told. He facing them while my back does. Then they walked and standing next to our table. And forgotten to tell that we wore same colour T-shirt. A guy was gazing at us as he told, so I glimpsed back.

I continued back my meal after that. So as I thought, he get the attention because he is good

looking guy. While people looked at me because my weird hair style almost same like Ah Wong in Life Made simple. The couple headed out to another restaurant but they walking around outside time by time. For your info, a chinese gay couple. After done , we saw the couple sat next to the A&W. As for him, trying to walk pass by the couple but I stopped him and take another route.

This time I stopped again at Padini outlet. I was looking for red causal attire. Then I receive a sms from a mystery caller ( reveal later). Surprisingly the caller saw us and I didn't saw him but he's already left. So I went to F.O.S and bought a red casual attire. Then bought some donuts from Big Apple. After that drove him back. He is young, mature, understandable yet good looking but then..........................

My Top List

2011-02-13T03:42:00.001+08:00

Happy Valentine.

I just wanted to share few songs for the coming of Valentine. Some pretty hard to choose. Went from Top 30 then narrow down Top 20. Some even are chinese songs. Just Sammi Cheng of course. :) And here there are :

Robbie Williams - Better Man

Sixpence None The Richer - Kiss Me

Diana Ross And Lionel Richie - My Endless Love

George Benson- Nothin' Gonna Change My Love For You.

NOTHING'S GONNA CHANGE MY LOVE FOR YOU (with Lyrics) - GEORGE BENSON - Funny bloopers R us

Air Suppy - Making Love Out Of Nothing At All.

Making Love out of Nothing at All by Air Supply - The best video clips are here

Boyzone - Everyday I Love You

Carpenters - Close To You

Celine Dion - Because You Loved Me

Chicago - Hard to say I'm Sorry

Linda Ronstadt and Aaron Neville - Dont Know Much

Mariah Carey and Boyz ll Men - One Sweet Day

Pebo Bryson and Roberta Flack - Tonight I Celebrate My Love For You.

Ronan Keating - When You Nothing At All

Ronan Keating - If Tomorrow Never Comes

S club 7 - Never Had A Dream Come True

Sammi Cheng - 终身美丽 * My Favourite*

Sammi Cheng - 最后一次 * My Favourite *

Taylor Swift - Love Story

Super Junior - It's You *Bradley. Your Favourite.*

Whitney Houston - I will Always Love

These are MY top 20 songs for Valentine. And Happy Valentine. :)

The hint.

2011-02-07T16:16:00.002+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

I wasn't sure whether was it weeks or months ago, i saw the same thing over and over. A name and 4 figures.When I think back and I've heard from "weelam" long time ago, the name is actually quite common, so many gays having the name too. But the figures wont just dont come naturally but randomly. May be a hint from the above.

Then there is the other one. No hint at all. But he told me, he's wanted to become priest. I cant change a "father" to gay. That is a sinful act. May be just let him be, for now.

Anyway Happy Valentine to couples out there. Have a Great and Fruitful day.

something something.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2011

2010-12-23T09:37:00.002+08:00

Merry Christmas to everyone and Happy New Year as well.

Hope you guys receive a wonderful gift from your love ones.

And abundant blessings from everyone as well.

May this Christmas and New Year a joyful yet thrill riding.

If there is no joyous way to give a festive gift, give love away (Quote)

Merry Christmas And Happy New Year. :D

Im still standing

2010-12-10T13:50:00.003+08:00

continue where we stopped.

Last month was horrible, horrible, and horrible. Everything was tied up of the assignments and tests, week after week. Not just that, many people fall sick including me, because the flu and weather. Then here came fever, cough and I had to dismiss myself for one test. After that week, I recovered abit after seeing Doc but sinus and sore throat took longer time. Then rushing of one the assignment. It was hard, and it relates to finance. It was my weakness link am

ong other business's subjects. But managed to done on time with the helps of friends there and here.

After that, prepare for the 2nd test the week after, management, my worst and intimidated subject to be fear on. I didn't do quite well when I remembered all the questions relate to calculations. It's a killing paper for me, same as to other people. But I got a week off after that test, still need to prepare 3 more and I didn't have any chance to meet any bloggers at that time being except my friends. And here I was crowned the FFK-King by someone. Then there was JJ. Saying about S&P and my name on it? hahaha. JJ. (later)

Last week, I was dizzy. Barely can stand, fell the surrounding is swirling. May because the 5 hours slept I had. Until now still got the feeling of dizziness. Then this week I took a wrong bus to college and nearly missed my test on Monday. It was afternoon that time, and cloudy day then raining heavily. I can hardly see then immediately jump on the bus. Then I realised, it took another route. I had to stop at bus station and ask for help. And someone did. I ride on his back. I mean motorbike. To a bus station where college students took. I manage to reach at college even though I was soaked abit with rains and time to spare for abit revising. Then the day after, I helped group mates completed parts of the assignments and sat for last test which I absent weeks ago.

And here I am done all the tests and assignments. Time update.

pic:credited
pic: credited

PS: I went to JW marriott hotel, took YTL's RM50 vouchers. Now I'm extraordinary shareholder..:P

Shout!!!!

2010-12-08T07:20:00.004+08:00

credited.

After this week, I will shout, not scream but SHOUT!!! Because no more tests and Assignments. And can get a good night sleep after been through 5 hours sleep for the past 4 weeks.

Innocent.

2010-11-13T15:26:00.002+08:00

Always want to find this song but couldn't. Full of privated. HAHA

Anyway just a random post only. If you could understand then consider good.

Enjoy.. :D

Why am I so Stubborn?

2010-11-05T19:44:00.005+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

Why am I so stubborn? This question was asked by him. Furthermore, why am I still keep waiting for "someone" to come back instead I can have him right now. And I told him, that I make a promise to "someone" that I will wait "someone" to be back here. It's nothing loss for me to wait "someone". If he don't like me after meeting me, it's fine by me. I don't mind. We can still be friends after that. I won't be so insane force "someone" into relationship with me. A relationship is about free will to choose from both partners agree on.

Miss you as Always.

I do miss "someone" so much. I even asked when "someone" will be back again and again. Then I don't bother to ask again. "Someone" busy with his workload again. But my stubbornness side want to know so badly or may be just let it be. Eventually he will tell me when. For now, I'm worry the guy. He got sparks on me. Sparks have because of the few meet up with him. And another guy is currently chasing him but he likes me more. Trouble I am getting into now. Just don't how know to tell him not to love me or forget me. It's hard but I did told him, still didn't work. I guess have to try another way. Find someone to be my partner so that he will know I found someone already. Because he is also stubborn as I do.

ps: Someone = JJ

Expect the unexpected

2010-10-16T02:18:00.005+08:00

continue where we stopped.

Credited

Last weekends I went outings with friends in Sunway Pyramid. Before it was outings, it's supposed to be the celebration of 3 gals' B'day. Because of certain unexpected thing occurred and eventually gone to chaos and stressed then backed to reality with the help of friends. From birthday bash to outings.

So, we head to Fullhouse located in Sunway Pyramid for lunchie. When we went to Fullhouse, we were approached by a waitress that we needed to book or register first before tables served for us. At first I thought, there is no need to booking because I asked around from my friends. While the waitress away, I headed to "paying counter" and saw a cashier and a manager who I might think she is. Then asked them for table for 8 ( actually was 9 b'cos one friend absently). And guess what, immediately I get the table from the manager. It's RESERVED table for 8. And I have "snatch" the poor guy's reservation. HAHAHA. Move on to the food, it's just typical as I said last time. The reason I going back there because my friends haven't been to Fullhouse before.

Credited

we kind of sat for 2 hours and half after the lunch. Soon the tables around us and further getting emptier one after the other. After paid the bill, we do casual shopping. Walk around Sunway Pyramid. Dinner time, we went to Pepper Lunch. The price doesn't match the proportion. Basically, it's expensive and it's DIY teppanyaki. It's just modest. Then I had sudden thought want to see Subang Boy because we heading to Snowflakes at Subang Jaya.

When we arrived, it's so jammed. Hard to find parking. Eventually we parked separately and meet at Snowflakes. Few of us went up and the place is so crowed and packed. :S. So unlucky unable to try it. Then head to Hong Kong Dessert just newly open at that Section. So I called Subang Boy out. But he unable to had dessert because he had sore-throat. :S. To see him again, it was great but slim down from the first time we met. :S. After few chat with him, he went to his hostel. I continue with my friends. After try few dessert, we call it a day and went our home.

The meet up .o( ___ )o

2010-10-03T02:37:00.004+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

I should have rejected him the day before I met him. The guy is not DN or JJ or SB. Not them.He is someone I met in Facebook. And share a mutual friend whom is Pikey. We started to exchange emails about months ago. We chatted and webcam but not most of the time. And he's quite cute also, his accent quite unique different from our Peninsular. Hard to differentiate his looks because he's abit like Chinese with Korean.By the way he is Sabahan. And ya, he's from Sabah. He came to Peninsular to undertaken medical course. And ya, again, he's younger than me by few years.

Before the meet up, all the while I do know that he had feelings for me, even though he said I'm too "perasaan" but my instinct served me right. But I did told him, that I already got someone else . So when our meet up, the whole day shopping with, I fell like I'm like a boyfriend to him. Then half way shopping, I realised that I had a meet up with Jino and Ichimaru. He went back to his friends while I stay and hang out with them.

This is the first time meet Ichimaru. He is funny, sensible and quite into anime especially those gay anime. HAHAHA. XD. While Jino same as usual, Ultraman Jino being cool and manly as Ichimaru described. HAHAHAHA. Dont kill me with your Ultraman's laser..:P. That day was laughable day because I in a hot seat again. With those "tactics question" Ichimaru throwing at me, made me instant go full flush red. Not just once but few times. HAHAHAHA. XD. Then He came back, after a few hour . After we sat an hour, we departed our own way head home while I accompanied him to Monorail Station and head own home.

*Picture credited*

The sorrowfulness

2010-09-18T03:10:00.003+08:00

Continue we where stopped.

I never thought to see him again. I didnt mean like meet him in person but, just a photo of him. And a couple of flashbacks. The calls, the messages, and everything. The feeling just gone from sorrow to acidic feeling. And this time everything starts come to my senses now. Deeply thoughts of it. Then I figured that I must be " Zhi Cheuk Toh Ching". Even though I not sure whether he likes me or not at that time. And the things I did, I told him, I wrote to him, it's really hurting him so much. I just couldnt forgive myself for doing that. I was too bloody amature and until now, I'm still is. Link*

I want to forget but couldnt let go. I have thought of it, if only I could be more mature and thoughtful to him at that time then it wont come to this stage. I bet by now he's already got himself a boyfriend, a better who will treasure him and love him.

Credited

Do it first, regret later.

2010-09-12T00:56:00.009+08:00

continue where we stopped.

Basically, I don't where this idea came from. May be the recent I commented things.:P. Anyway, I saw this quote from someone's blog. It's pretty interesting to see he wrote tis quote in his comment box. May be he did things unthinkably, but still I liked it. :D But it doesn't mean that you'd do things you feel liked it, sometimes must care others' feeling else well rather than *membabi buta*.

There always a seed hope...credited

If didn't try pretty much hold more regrets than did. I didn't meant that you should try drug or anything against your nature, try something within your capable will. If you failed, it doesn't mean you total failed all, you still can stand and try again and again, until you succeed. Don't mind what other people think or look on you, because this is your life, when you're looking back. Don't constraint yourself. In stage of life, it's all about learning process with all the mixture feelings whether sad, sorrow, depress, tear, cheerful, happy, joyful, and etc. And of course, all these are based within my capability knowledge and I admit that I'm lousy and terrible blogger but still I'm in a learning progress. :)

I never wanted to post something relating to my past or sadness because more people out there going tough time then I do. They deserve a better story of life then I do. A little understanding and different perspective is wise worth than sympathy because never in this world people like to be sympathized, including me.:)

Enjoy the video. Inspiration come when you are young. Link to the video.

Embarrassing Moment...:D

2010-09-04T18:04:00.003+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

I guess there's grace moment and embarrassment moment. Mine embarrassing moment happened in parking lot, college, when I needed to submit a form. I parked my car and head to the department. I glimpsed few students smoothing around ( I meant walking around ) and a car's reaching down from the slope. When I stepped on concrete road curbs, I slipped and fall down, and the car stopped in front me ( in far distance). One hand landed on the road supporting the whole body, while the arm and leg have scratches, and bleeding.

The passengers in the car would have came out and helped me but
didn't. HAHAHA..:D. So I on my own, stand up and head to the building. As quickly I went to department, without worry my injuries. I reached and give out the form as both my hands were shaking especially the supporting one. The officer noticed my injuries and was kind given me the medication.

Yeah, I'm clumsy. If only if I fall down gracefully, and pose few shots *bang* bang* bang*and put a sign of "Peace"...HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA...XD

Credited

3 wise Monkey

2010-08-19T23:27:00.004+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

speak no evil, see no evil, hear no evil.

These are the 3 wise monkey.

To me:

I don't want speak because I wanna hear you say " I love you"

I don't want see because I wanna you to say " Miss me more"

I don't want hear because I wanna see how much affection you have for me.

HAHAHAHAHA...:P

Joking..:P

Me Becoming Bisexual

2010-08-14T01:32:00.004+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

One day.......

My friends and I meet up for "yum cha " (small gathering) between us. Because for so long we meet this friend after she quitted her studies. Just four of us (included me). 2 gals ( pretty gal 1 and pretty gal 2) and 2 guys ( Big Man and I ).

We talk, talk, talk, talk

We laugh, laugh, laugh, laugh

We tell kinky stuffs

~~about men
~~about women
~~sex
~~lovers
~~pretty much everything.

Then so sudden of them bring the issue of my lover. To your info, way back I told them, that I like this "Girl"(DN)and I didn't told them the about JJ.

So that day, they cornered me and tackle me with questions about the "Girl". And Basically I do was kept covering my lies one another because got Big Man here. But if just Pretty Gal 1 and 2 here only, I wont mind tell them my sexuality. But I didn't.

As their questions forwarding to me, I kept dragging my lies until certain extend back to square one. This time I almost wanted to tell out, that the "Girl" was guy. The words almost reached my lips and I spitted it out. I told them the JJ. Yeah, I didn't told them about the "Girl" and it remained as secret.

As I told them, here goes again, QUESTIONS. Eyes rolling. @_@

All I do was coughing. Avoiding any answers but I do tried to say abit, not too much to leak..

At first, they didn't accept it but slowly then digested, accepted who I am.

At that moment, I told them, pretty much everything about the "Girl" (DN) and JJ. They even suggested me to dump these two and get a third person....HAHAHAH..

Eyes Rolling again...@_@

I do believe that,
I in front their eyes, I am Bisexual.
But in their heart, I am gay.

Smoking

2010-08-12T10:02:00.005+08:00

Continue where we stopped

I want to smoke so badly.

The cigarette touched the lips.

Then light up the cigarette.

Take in (inhale in).

Then smoke it out.

Smoking..Credited

One stressful day just passed........

Don't you loved it the song I have it.

We'll Be A Dream - We Are King feat Demi Lovato

Stupid I am

2010-08-10T22:21:00.005+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

Someone asked me, why am I so stupid, still keep waiting for that someone?

Firstly, no gain or loss waiting someone

Secondly, I want him tell me straightly from his mouth. Guessing is HARD like playing RPG games. Because past few weeks is just guess only.

Thirdly, It's a promise because the fourth.

Lastly, It's doesn't matter whether he likes me or not, or to continue the journey, it's just part of responsibility.

Sometimes I'm blindly waits.:P

A promise like a responsibility..Credited

ps: I didn't have sex with any one or everyone. I'm still me.

My Drug.

2010-07-31T13:58:00.003+08:00

continue where we stopped.

enjoy coffee :P..credited

Non related topic but yeah, My drug is coffee...:P

I would drink 3 0r 4 cups of coffee per day, especially nescafe.

Even, Sky juice not that so much....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH~~~XD

I'm worst than my dad. He limit himself 2 cups only....hehe...:P

One day can't escape of drinking coffee. Even in college, I would buy a can. and have it.

without them really don't have energy to start the day.

ohhh...Coffee is my babe...:P

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA~~~XD

Ouch*

2010-07-22T09:43:00.004+08:00

continue where we stopped

Lesson before sex.

Don't try this at home

My friends told us (guys not lover)

brush the KKJ (penis) before sex.

and O.M.G. It's painful If doing that.

Typical girls.

Their boyfriends must be suffering by now.....HAHAHAHA...:P

No....credited

Sex...:P

2010-07-20T17:30:00.009+08:00

continue where we stopped.

No SEX No Love

applicable to Lover only not Sex partner

:P

Source

Train station

Examine

2010-07-19T08:20:00.005+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

I always want tell this:

So many gay doctors around.

The scary part, they will examine every single of inch of your body. Touches.

But if a hot doctor, dont mind.

Neh...What the heck~~

Need to see doctor also anyway.

Good luck on your " Medical Check up"....

:PPP

Doctor..source

Joking..:P

next pit Stop..

Jerk

2010-07-18T13:55:00.004+08:00

continue where we stopped

Yes~~

I Am A Jerk~~~~

What to do~~~~~

next bust stop ~.~

Shooting Stars

2010-06-28T22:59:00.007+08:00

Have really seen a shooting star before? And sky full of stars? I did. It was magnificent. Back then, I was in National Service’s camp at Raub, Pahang, it was happiest and most enjoyable days though miss them so much. One day, in evening, we (40 guys and 40 gals) went to the hill for camping. We grouped among ourselves. My three friends and I set up the camp but no fire. As set up is done, we laid down and gazing the beautiful night sky. The night is bright because of the stars. It was everywhere. Then few shooting stars.

I make a wish. I wish I could find someone I loved and try being there with him when he needs me. Sometimes keep a small piece of hopes, dreams, and wishes inside your heart rather than give up all these. Like these songs “ When you wish upon a Star “ sung by Louis Amrstrong and “Airplanes” by B.O.B featuring Hayley Williams also “Don’t dream it’s over by Sixpence None The Richer. As a man walks with faith and confident shows that someone you can really depends on. Same to hope, dreams and wishes. As with them, the journey of life and love will through the hardship in life. We never born to serve one purpose but many because we are not robot but human fresh.

To be continued........

I wish it wasn't True

2010-06-27T01:40:00.004+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

I still not sure and have that kind of confident to start a relationship. Loving a person will inspire you but also will hurt you. To this stage, am I worth for their love? Worth enough to exchange our heart and kept inside, solely for us only? Sometimes just wondering around, thinking, if it would be easy as 1, 2 3 rather than think so complicated. Think so much will affect the relationship and cause misunderstanding among others. Worse, break up without realizing the truth. Even does realized it but it may be too later to hold it unless say “I’m Sorry”.

Saying sorry is hardest thing to do, sometimes just had to put side the egotistic and say it rather than regretted from not doing so. Even has a song “Hard to say I’m Sorry” sung by Chicago and losing someone you love is far more painful and sad. It takes longer time to heal those wounds and be back on own feet. Sometimes seeing this like a cycle never ending relationship when each relationship ended. So whatever matters bring up on the table whether good or bad, calm down and settle in a private manner. The best possible way is “I’m Sorry”

As for my life diary, it seems that I think I lost two birds on my hand. Flying away. Blaming me and the faults I did. When I realized, it’s too late. It could be no turning back. There is no redemption in this matters as already forgone. As to all the matters will be well in hidden inside my heart. Be a cheerful. If only hear a sound from them. I wish this wasn’t true.

The End....Part 1

The Egg

2010-06-17T22:16:00.008+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

Did you still remember I mention about June’s babies in last post? Actually I missed one person, my cousin brother. HAHA~~Yeah he born in June and I totally forgotten about him..XD Hope he won’t blame me. Last week we did a small celebration for my sister. Her friends around 7 of them plus few of my cousin family’s members. We prepared some meals and barbecue. Earlier we planned another celebration at Zouk and asked her friends to come along.

Donashi

During the celebration, I learnt that some, well most of them didn’t want to turn up for the party due to certain circumstances that they won’t make it. I was pissed so as my cousins and saw my own sister eyes swollen. As much I want to yell at them but I can’t because parent and relative were there. I buried it deep down inside and avoid any conflicts with them. After the celebration, we head to Zouk as my cousins were waiting. I did ask someone about Zouk and they told me it’s looked like an egg. Actually it does. :P Before enter, security check. What to do, my sister and I looked very young.:P

Zouk...Source

The party was great and we have fun even though I had 1 glass, it’s enough for me. Then the real party started. Dance time. I had trouble in dancing. It’s seems I not drunk enough not letting myself freely. :P After that, we go for another round, but I didn’t. I saw many eye candies and even gays too. I also saw Koo Kien Keat. He walked by passed me few times. On 3am something we called it off. We went our own and my sister and I went to SS2 Murni to meet up with her friends. I saw a cute guy eating his supper and the distance just few tables. Then we went home for another beer ceremony, not me of course but my sister’s friend and her. I slept.

To be continued

v(^0^)v

Love me by

Nicholas

Bear Bear

2010-06-08T16:56:00.006+08:00

Continue where we stopped.
Last few weeks, on 23rd of May 2010, was Bear’s birthday. We didn’t celebrate on that day but the day before. We went to Fullhouse in Sunway Pyramid. I think I’m the earliest guy reached there. I had been rounding around Sunway Pyramid while waiting for them. When they do, we sat, looked on menu and the prices were abit expensive to me.:P They ordered the foods look great and unique but won’t sure the taste. I ordered the Salmon sandwich. The environment was great and few eye candies. Camwhore and present time. I thought want buy String doll for him but luckily Jino and his lover bought. Is this mean I exempted?.:P.

String Dolls...Source..

After that, we wondering around, then head to Hawker stall. While eating and chatting these guys still haven’t given up the idea go clubbing. Luckily I wore short pant..:P Then I thought want to bring them to Snowflake at SS15 but I didn’t. We went back, thinking want watch midnight movie, but I couldn’t and had to reject. At least I’m not the worst, the cinema does, fully booked or some. So no choice, we went for Kim Gary. We sat 2 tables for 5 persons. And next table is a young straight couple.

We ordered the foods and drinks. In few moments, they came. As we have our things, the girl in 20’s ( I think ) kept scratching her legs and hands saying the place is dirty and make her itchy. But her boyfriend didn’t feel it. I’m abit pissed at the moment because of her action. Luckily is a moment thing, or else I will scold her. After they went off, my mood down, and someone ask for sex education, and I never thought Jino so good in this. XD. Carrot, cucumber, lady finger, etc. You guess it.:P. We waited until 12 am and wish bear then head home.
strawberry aloe vera drink...source...

ps: Subang Boy got lover already, Don't think too much...:P
v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

June

2010-05-30T23:06:00.005+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

In few more days, will be ended May 2010 and begin June 2010. I lived another month, still got 7 months to go before year ended 2010. Then, about JJ, still have 3 more months before he’ll back and I have a chance to meet him. :P To think, the past few weeks, I didn’t even miss him may be I got my own things to busy on or worry on..HAHAHA~~~. He’ll be back around August or September, if I calculated correctly..:P Should I give him surprise or just pretend don’t know?.:) I don’t what to do when he is back. Seriously. Should I take the first step or he does? Even I do, what is the next step? Lunch, movie, dinner, topics, kiss, hug, etc? By the way his birthday is on 24^th of June and same as to my sister and niece. June’s babies.

Sweet....Source

For JJ, may be I sent those “links” to him as birthday gift..XD. As for my sister, I haven’t planned to buy anything yet even though hers is on next week. May be a Keroro or bag. :).As for my cousin, my mom will handle her red packet..XD. Woah!! That solved the problem. Let’s talk people I’d met. Rawang didi. I met him on the first day of the college. He gave the first impression was he is very slim, much slimmer than me. Almost same height as me but I think his weight less than 50kg or lesser. There was once he told me about when he speaks, people will be shocked, and I know the reason to that.:P

Keroro....source

He likes to give criticism and he reminded me of someone else, DN. I should “jodohkan” both of them..Wuahaha.:P And not just that, he like to talk about inspiration whatever he see and touch in surrounding environment. He even wrote it down on small note book every single little detail and guess what, he is multimedia student. Luckily he is not a business student or else I don’t know what to do. To me, he’s still kid, abit childish, and he love Lady Gaga so much. One of his admirable performers. That’s all. Don’t forget 31^st May, Baskin Robbins…..hehe..XD

Lady Gaga...Source

to be continued.

v(^0^)v

Love me by

Nicholas....

Subang Boy

2010-05-17T08:51:00.004+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

For quite some time, I want to meet Subang boy, and so as him. But I have been rejecting him almost every time (FFK). I’m so bad. Spank me please!!. HAHAHAHAHA!!!! On 14^th of May 2010, this would be the day we remembered as our first seeing each other. He planned to have dessert at SS15, Snowflake because he recommended. Before I went to see him, I do some research about him, he likes to wear dark shirts because I webcam with him few times and saw it. I deliberately wear a dark T-shirt s to meet him. When I reached at SS15, the road is jam, no parking but luckily he told me to wait at MCD, and at same time a van is reversing. I parked, wait him at MCD. When I saw him, I was smiling and laughing. He is cute and “lengchai”. Make me feel want to lean on his shoulder. Ok!!!! Back to the dessert, Snowflake just few blocks away and located upside.

Snowflake SS15..Source

We have the Snowflake bestseller. And the best of all, he treats me..XD. Mine is free, his has to pay. While not exactly free, he has to collect 10 stamped Snowflake’s logo. Imagine the dessert cost is RM6.50 for every stamp he has. And total is RM 65.00. Wah!!! Mine is damn expensive. LOL. But I do appreciate every little abit of the dessert. HAHA~~~~!!! We talked gay stuff so loud some people turn and look at us. It’s like we become the centre of the attention of the table. Then most of the time, I didn’t dare to stare into his eyes, I was looking at my bowl while eating. To me, his eyes so attractive. Then so sudden of him, asked to show him my legs, and I know my legs is beautiful, no one can’t compare with that. :P

After we had the wonderful dessert, we head to a bakery shop. He recommended that I should have Durian Puff. This time is his treats again. LOL. The Durian Puff was great and nice. Back to talk, then he asked for arm wrestling. I suspected he want to hold my hand for so long time. So I played along. :P I gave my entire best shoot, seeing he can’t push anymore, I purposely let him win. HAHAHA~~~!!!! After that, it’s time for him to head back to hostel, while I take this opportunity to use old trick, hold hand crossing road and I did. :P He fell abit embarrasses because he worries his friends might see it. He accompany me walk back to my parking space. Later on, I asked him to give me Goodbye Kiss. But he didn’t give. T.T Next time I will treat him back but have to look on my schedule first. :P When will be JJ turn, DN turn, Damansara boy turn,? Hmmmm…XD

I win...Source

"Dude Seriously"..:P

to be continued

v(^0^)v

Love me by

Nicholas

Emails....XD

2010-05-08T03:29:00.011+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

Almost a month I didn’t post anything in this blog. Feel like want to give up on posting. May be due to my laziness to write even though has ideas to post. For the last few weeks, I sent 5 emails to JJ and replied 3. The other 2 just 3 weeks back sent. I didn’t immediately read the emails, I leave it to next day, but I was overly joy seeing he replied my emails. I think there’s still a place for me in his heart.:P I asked him about his previous relationship, in which it’s ridiculous to ask something that he had let go. But, hey!!! He did answer. He told me, behind the scene of his previous relationship. When I read, make me realised that he is strong in person, can handle almost everything but not in relationship. The reason is he had to work at overseas for few months in every year. So you can imagine that some guys don’t like long distance relationship because they want someone care them all the time.

Dumb Blond: SoUrCe

I did asked him about if broke his lover heart would he present gifts to gain him back. That depends. But one funny statement he made about secret affair and cheating make me laughed the whole time. Let say, if my lover is having secret affair behind my back with or without me knowing, I totally kick his butt (@$$). If he asks me to reattach with him, I would reject. This guy likes to swing around (the F word) like dogs, and sleep like nobody business, better dump him for good. Even I do reattach with him, but faith and trust doesn’t exist there anymore because I worry he will do again.

Guys with tattoo sexy too : SoUrCe

JJ is gifted with many things but he committed one of the “gay public ruling acts” that he is quite sensitive type of guy. Sensitive guys are hard to handle. Worry they might misunderstand that what they claim is true but is not. Must handle them in the gentle way, and filter all the info to straightforward communication. Body language also must set apart because he will misinterpret it and a call of the house will carry out. To avoid any misinterpretation, one has straightforward and avoids any body contact..:P

Hmm, which to choose?...: SoUrCe

to be continued.

v(^o^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

I wish.....

2010-04-08T19:00:00.007+08:00

continue where we stopped

Yesterday was a great and wonderful day and I never thought this would be happened to me. I was in bed with my bf. =3. I was looking, watching and gazing on him while he sleeping. I moved myself closer to him bit by bit under the comforter. I zoomed my eyes on him. He look much cuter when he slept. He wiggle his nose and move his hand toward his nose. Suddenly he turn his whole body toward to me, crossed his leg to mine, hugged me like a bolster, bring me more closer to his body, his chest.

I fell his breathing, his heart beats and warmness.I fell so close and so intimate. My heart beat so fast, and start to feel hot. There are so much intensity going on.I didn't know what to do. And he begin to snore. He look pretty tired judging on his snore. So I reached my hand out and hugged tightly. Never thought that he is so nice to hug. I fell this is the right person.

After going through all this, I heard dog barking outside the window. It must be those cats, provoked the dog. So I don't bother, and get back to sleep. After few minutes, the dog stopped barking and my phone turn to ring. I wake up and saw, it's 8am something. I was like DAMN, it's just a dream. But this wonderful dream I ever had. =3

I been thinking, if I could date these guys, would that be great and awesome. The first guy I would want to date is

1st= Bosco Wong....=3

2nd =Ron Ng.....XD

3rd= Samuel Chan.....^0^

4th= Raymond Lam.....<3

If you're me , who you would rank from the top to the bottom..

v(^-^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

LOL= Laugh Out Loud

2010-03-31T04:23:00.003+08:00

Continue where we stopped.

When I told DN and JJ about a list guys want to date me, they were shocked, surprise, and speechless especially JJ. He was sad and saying that I was selling like hot cake which is not true. Actually, the list is just based on my observation and analysis. Furthermore this is no 100% accurately is true, it's just a prediction. And sometimes JJ might misunderstand What I mean or may be because Im 23 year old and he is XX year old, an age gap difference between us. But still I don't mind this differences, just an obstacle in my way, in which I will get through it. LOL..XD. In my contact list, I had almost everyone I known except one person, JJ. I didn't manage to ask his contact..>.<

Does he look familiar to you?...XD

For quite some time, I didn't see JJ online in MSN and because his heavy workloads. I thought want to write email to him everyday but I'm scared that I might annoy him. So may be once or twice a week email to him is enough. But create abit confusion in email, and he will reply me..:p. Lets not talk about them for while, shift to me. This few weeks I missed few things. Firstly was Mark gathering. Earlier I promised Mark I will go but before the day came, I had to turn it down because I need to accompany my mom to Mid Valley, happened to fall on same day. I regretted for not joining them but still rewarded for me to follow my mom and gladded to meet someone. That someone is my cousin brother's friend. He's very good looking, handsome, charming and cute too. Not very offen to see him or meet him anytime. Subang and I had same taste of guys. *secret* *wink*....HAHAHAHAHA....XD. Three words to describe him are "Lengchai" "Lengchai"and "Lengchai".....HAHAHA...XD

Shoes...or Sneaker ..or sandals?..XD

The second thing i missed out is meeting Leu. I turn the inviation down because I need to revise my studies for the next sitting. I heard they were enjoy..hehe. And the next day, My parent and I went to visit my cousin in Shah Alam because she went for an operation late few days for her nose saying that she had breathing difficulty. We all went out to have dinner at Puchong Jaya with another cousins and their parent. After that, we went back home to our cousin sister house. We chat until almost 11pm. Before we go, our cousin give us a of shoes bought it from Japan. I dont know why they gave us the shoes but I love it. LOL..XD

If you like High School Musical then you gonna love Glee.

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

Hot!!!!!! Hot!!!!!!! Hot!!!!!....

2010-03-19T15:59:00.007+08:00

continue where we stopped

This few weeks, the weather is so hot and i cant have a good night sleep even i switch on the air conditioner.The whole days I was tired and sleepy but the worst pimples popping out..>.<. I didn't use any facial foam to clean my face.I just use water. At first i want to oxy cream on those pimples but then it make my skin dry, so I decided not to put. Last week, I had my hair cut short and same like last time. Nothing much changed and still, this is me.

Eric Tang....Isn't it he's Gorgeous??...*drooling...XD

About previous post, some of you (included JJ) mistakenly I was with JJ now but actually not. I'm still haven't decide the who guy I want and the decision still upon on me. Lets not discuss that. About the question he asked, is 1 month ago and that time I was online dating DN for almost 3 months. At that moment, my heart and mind was DN the whole time. And Suddenly this JJ appeared out of no where, but he did said that he saw my comment on someone blog. At time i was like scare and afraid that he might be a stalker..:p After a few chats with him, I asked for his picture and he did sent to me. When i saw "a" picture of him, I find him quite lencghai also but just a picture wont satisfy my hunger..:p Guys dun't mistaken the picture he sent to me is shirtless picture or any overated. Actually is a normal picture...:p

My Laptop under service......:s
He concerned me more than I do. Sometimes I do want to ask more info about of him, but afraid he will get annoyed by me. So i restricted myself to ask so many things. Furthermore, he and I had a different level of understanding but i had patience which I can get through this. And yes, my patience did get through it, he even sent me his 2nd and 3rd picture to me. TO tell you the truth, I like the 2nd and 3rd pictures more than 1st he sent to me..:p But very unfortunated that all of his pictures inside my laptop and my laptop is under service because the screen having problem but my laptop still under warranty for 4 years so it's a blessing....XD I will be having back my laptop by this week. In the mean time, I will be using my sister desktop to write blog and Facebook...:p

Alice In Wonderland- 3D....XD

Last Saturday, Pikey, Bear, Jino and his bf (Ediwn), and I went to Mid Valley to watch Alice in Wonderland in 3D. At first I want to ask Subang to come along and join us because I will be a lonely guy with 2 couples mushy around. But Subang couldn't make it because he need to accompany his friends for shopping. So it looks like I will be going alone will be joining these 2 couples. In Mid Valley, we had dinner in Vietnamese Food Restaurant. The food is quite ok, sweet and souring taste. After that we head to collect the tickets ( Pikey book the tickect at a lower cost ...XD) but very unfortunated that the hall break down. So he asked for refund and we around Mid Valley and The Gardens. Some suggested that do karaoke in Red box but too expensive for me so i said NO. But there is one thing caught me is Pikey looking at guys. When we walked by passed an ice cream stall, we saw 2 cute guys buying ice creams for each other and Pikey's eyes were fixed on those cute guys instead of the ice creams...:p

Chocolate Indulgence...Yummy..XD
After that we head to Secret Recipe. We ordered different cakes to taste. But the cakes i like the most is Marble Cheese cake and Chocolate Indulgence....XD. After tasted so much cakes, we didn't know where to head but we stopped at Starbucks. Then we saw a guy wear yellow T-shirt and short pant. Some said he is cute and muscular but to me, he abit too "fat" for my appetitie...:p Bear and I didn't order any drinks. Jino and Edwin share a lemon tea and Pikey ordered a cup of tea. The tea taste weird and smell like perfume. When I drank the tea, is like drinking a bottle of perfume ( sorry Pikey...:p). We had a chit chat and seated for an hour, we went back home.

to be continued.

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

Do you think it will last??.................

2010-03-11T19:58:00.003+08:00

continue where we stopped.

necklace.....love letters
I think JJ did ask me question about " do you think it will last?", I was hesitate but I didn't immediately answer nor reply him. I didn't know what to say or how to say, it might look simple but then think again, it's not a very easy to answer. Though have to take into consideration of present and future but the past will haunt us forever for what so ever the decision had make. Always has to carry on our life with regrets. Sometimes just have to let go of the past, move on with our life. Life is like a tiny black dot,you,yourself pick up a pencil and start drawing lines, connects with other dots. You may feel alone but you dont't. You still have familly and friends to cheerish and love them every single moment.

I still don't how to answer JJ regarding this question, even though i did answered him through email but still, not the answer that i would answered him. This time I would tell him, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know. But i would tell him this:

Love, love, love, love, love

I want to be with you in present more than future. I will cherish the moments we together in present more than future.
I will treasure our love more in present rather than future
Because present give us hope of being together and love wouldn't faint away in one day.

Future is uncertain, blur, and cloudy, unknown what will happen, therefore in present, we have to cherish every single we loved, be there with them every single moments.

Someone told me that he doesn't love his lover, merely just want to be friends. He doesn't want to hurt his lover feeling, instead he took it all and be by his lover side. He worries his lover might had emotionally break down and heart break. But what Im worry is how long does this relationship will last.

to be continued

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

First Love.....................

2010-03-04T17:53:00.006+08:00

continue where we stopped.

this post will be credited to an anonymous (whoever you are, come and claim your prize), for giving me this inspiration to write this post.

Add me.....wuahahaha...XD

Actually what had anonymous mentioned in the previous posted, was true. Yeah, I do love DN so much,I treated him as like my first love more than anyone else before JJ come into the picture. DN is actually younger than me by 2 years, he is undergraduate student (same like me). We know each other when he read my blog and be friend in Facebook. The first of impression on him was, I thought he was an older guy because he is so secrective and separated account from his another Facebook. So in the first month chatting with him in Facebook, I found him very irratiting guy, because in that particular month i was total in stress of my courseworks and assignments. As time passed, I take the initiative to ask a picture of him. The first picture he showed wasn't clear and blur. Later on, he start to show me the 2nd and 3rd pictures. When I saw it, I found, he is a cute guy and we start exchange email.

When we start accepting each other, we started online dating. He is an itelligent guy but not a smart guy even though he is an innocent boy. He told me, that he is in "president list" and most of his friends want to group with him because his result better than any of his classmates. The way he handled stuff, well, not so well managable, even his boss said, he's not a smart guy. At this point, I take the initiative to ask again for online webcam, and he hold doubt, thinking want or don't want because all mom will tell their children not to answer the door when the strangers knocked. The first few webcam with him was, he so secretive and he won't even dare to show his face to me. After that, he took some courage to show me his face because I was joking that I was pissed for not showing his face to me.

I Love You......so cute the Teddy Bear...XD

Few weeks later we start to exchange phone number. From that moment, I start to have those mussy feeling, and missing him so much. Everyday I wished my classes would end earlier so that I could see him again. There was one day, I took the intiative to express my feeling toward him and said " I Love you". He wont immdiatedly accept my love, but he had doubt of we being together. He told me that he is bisexual and he doesn't want to sleep with a guy, just want to be friend. He is shy guy and likes to criticise people a lot. He doesn't like his friends so much because he told me his friends treated him cold and bad.

Life is never simple, life isn't hard, life is experience because in life had to make decision.

to be continued.

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

p.s: Thank you Koala express.............HAHAHAHAHA.....XD

The other guy......(/^0^)/

2010-02-28T16:22:00.012+08:00

continue where we stopped

The other guy I mean was JJ. He is mature guy, and very thoughful person. He always worry about me, going where, going with who and etc. He cares for me alot even though i seldom ask him. he is innocent but a smart guy from the way he asked and expressed thing so beautiful. He dont't like sarcasm so much even i joked around so much. That was once he asked me, what i am doing at that moment. I told him, I was stalking lengchai's pictures in Facebook. Actually I was looking at my friends' profile and pictures. He just answered me on word, ok.

The second time, i joked about gals. This, i cant tell you so details...hahaha...From that moment, i can tell he don't like it so much. Then I know how to handle him, total WWE smackdown....Wuahaha...joking. He is a sincere guy looking for sincerely in love. He had a bad relationship with few guys. This is because he travel alot, some guys can't handle long distance relationship. I don't want discuss this too details as the his relatiohsip with his ex-lovers are past, as the time frozen forever, no one could alter the time unless he wants to. He has come through many hardships and had become stronger as faced many pierced arrow.

holding each other hands in public so wonderful......XD
He is sweet and romantic guy. He said he wants to go on date with watch movie then have dinner together, he wants to hug me and hold my hands. He wants to be with me, accompany me from time to time. He is passionate and dedicated guy. He will put all his love on this relationship to work and will dedicate it.

Ahhh...hug, hug, hug,hug....XD

As I, also a romantic person. Firstly i will date him, then we go watch movie. After that we will buy dinner and we will head to place where can see stars. We will lay on top car root. we will feed each other. I will may my head on his chest. Hear his heart beats and his breathing while holding each hands. No kisses. That would totally ruined the romantic environment.

Do you want a hug??.....XD

And no mussy like Pikey and Bear or Clayden and Beau ( beh Tahan lo) or else i will become their 2nd generation lol.. They so contagious, better stay away from them....HAHAHA x100. May be you two couples buy this shirt ......XD

But JJ is not funny enough. Mostly I see is "ok" "ohh", not much "Hahaha" fans like me.....HAHAHAHA...XD. He's a sensitive guy and sometimes can be passive too. He also a secrective person. These just only the surface, the deep down person, I will know later when he's back from london.

The differences between DN and JJ is that JJ had more experience ( You guys know lo..so no nd so detail la right.....hahaha....XD). DN on the other hand is undergraduate student and doesn't have that kind experience for that field yet. Both of also charming guys. But DN and I in the middle of cold war. So don't worry about us......hahahahaha...XD

Have a safe Journey JJ.....XD

to be continue

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

2 birds injured badly....(o-o)

2010-02-22T17:36:00.001+08:00

The two golden birds' hearts injured badly. I want to treat these two birds' wound but they so angry and ignored me. My heart hurts don't know what to do or just let it be. I love these two birds so much, and other birds cant replace their good hearts.

Im pretty emo right now and moody.... Don't know what to do...@.@

Got Angpao!!!!!! No Rose Bouquet!!!!

2010-02-21T18:25:00.003+08:00

On the first of Chinese New Year, we went to our Mother's side. We had lunch at Manhanthan Fish Market in Cineleisure Mall and our cousin sister treat us all. Also the same day to celebrate valentine's day with family. After that, watch a lion dance show and take some picture abit also watch some eye candies. Not just Cineleisure mall have lion dance, the curve did have too. In the evening we went to Sunway Piramid to dinner at Tony Roma's. The ribs and Steaks are great and the place so crowded. This time is our cousin brother treat us all.

The second day, we went to out father side. As usual, we greet, take angpoa, eat and drink. Also not to forget, gamble.......HAHAHA...XD. We go anywhere, we gamble until there. Of course we gamble small amount of money, just to have fun once a year. In the evening, we play some sparks fireworks and took some picture abit with cousins.

On the third day, we went our aunty (dad's sis) house to have lunch and take some angpao for relatives. The fouth day, we didn't go anywhere but stay at home and sixth day too.

The fith day, we went out to have dinner at Grand Imperial inside the Bangsar shopping Complex. The food there was great and the price so fabulousity. And we took picture with lion dance.

The seventh day, our relatives (dad's side) and mom's friends came to visit our house. So the whole day, preparing food, chores, entertaing the guests and etc. In evening my friend came to our house for a visit. Soon later we visit others friend's house and took picture with my school friends.

Today I'm abit moody....don't want to say so much thing.......Tomorrow enjoy your work day.....HAHA...XD

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

CNY and Val.......

2010-02-12T20:10:00.005+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year
And
Gong Xi Fa Cai

May you have a great in
Health
Wealth
Success
Joy and Fun
To each and everyone of you
Also
Have a safe trip back to your hometown

Valentine's Day

Enjoy every single moment with your ones
Sweet memories
Hug your love ones
Kiss you love one
and
Many many many Happie.

Uncertainty.......@.@

2010-02-11T09:49:00.007+08:00

Sorry for the late update. For the last few weeks, I had being helping my mom prepare something for the Chinese New Year.

Continue where we stopped.

Yeah, I do love DN but have to wait for 2 years because that time he will be graduating from his university. Recently he told he need to do final project and thesis either in local or outstation.At first I was silent and didnt say anything but he on other hand, undecided thinking whether want to go for local or outstation. In my heart of course want him stay continue do his studies in local but further studies at outstation is important because widen his knowledge and seeing things differently. And this week, I am still not sure whether he will back for Chinese New Year or not even though i asked him.

The other problem I have is long distance relationship. It's not very easy to maintain such a relation while two people in miles away from each other. The current drifted along those feelings, passions to sea as time fly. I cannot contain his feeling for me neither could I. One day he and I have to let go each other for the sake of finding true happiness if we cannot provide the happiness we want.

Besides that, in process of waiting him in this two year,i dont know either i can contain my wildness side or not. And not just that, I dont know im still alive to meet him or may be he meet me in graveyard. Furthermore i even tell him someone want to date me.

to be continue......

This Monday (8/2/2010) I went to shop for new clothes for this Chinese New Year. So long time I didnt take bus to Chow Kit Monorail Station. When I in Diploma i used to take bus to Chow Kit Monorail Station and change another bus to our college. And before that, sometimes, I take monorail to Sg.Wang to buy somethings. They were few times i met this guy in the monorail whenever i take it. This guy really really really cute, more cuter than Raul and Lee CH. There was one day, I need to buy comics from Sg wang, so as usual take monorail, and stopped another station then I met again. He coming as the door shut, then suddenly he talk to me as we stand 2 meters away. My heart beat very fast as I don't know what to say to him, im so shy, my hand's sweating, I avoided his eye contact. As he come closer, I didn't know what to say to him or may be just "Hi" or something else. He stopped and calling, as i looked up, he was calling the guy beside me. What a let down.=="

This Monday, I shopped 2 pair of short pants, a pair of shoe and a jeans. Before my sister arrive, I was doing window shopping, I saw alot of lengchai in Times Square and Sg. Wang and even so i saw gals intimate with another gals.O.O

a pair of new shoe....EDWIN

Skinny Jeans....I bought it from Romp....Guess how much?...XD

a pair of new shorts .....Guess how much for each??.....XD

May be today or tomorrow I will shop for T-shirts. When I think back new year resolution, I think I achieved two resolution........hahahahahaahahahhaha.......XD

Thank You MyChan Boyzz for specially wish me, my brithday with a sexy picture in his blog...hahahahahaha....XD

Thank Youuuuuuu
Muack......<3

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

Love Story....v( ^0^)//

2010-01-27T18:50:00.007+08:00

Once a upon time, there lives a prince charming in far far away land. He always walks to the garden and starred at the starry night. He wished something like he always did it. He wished someone will take him to somewhere far away from here, beyond his boundary palace.

One day, in the night, the prince knee on the beautiful garden and make a same wish to the beautiful sky. As he hold his hand together and whisper his wishes, then he saw a star, shine as bright as any stars before. Suddenly he fell something unpleasant, as the star approach getting closer, close and closer. He couldn't flee as he told his feet to move but couldn't, as they were stoned.

The star flew closer to him and he feared something bad will happen. And the star stood right front of him, gazing on him.The prince was in shock and speechless. He scared like a little mouse running off from it's prey, freak out and sweat out from his body. on the other hand, the star start to spin and spin and "pop", a fairy appeared out of that star, shine brightly and he saw small figure with beautiful butterfly wings flipping on the mid air.

to be continued............

continue where we stopped.............

Last few week before my exams start, we had chat and he told all sort of things, I don't know I still remember what he told, I try recall. Before he went back to university life, he told me, I'm gonna miss him and he's same as well. Besides that he told to wait him for 2 more years and drive my car. It's ok to let him drive my car but wait him 2 years, haiz, I don't i have that kind of patience to wait for 2 years. I told him all sort things too. I will date another guy if my cant wait. Then I joke around more. I even tell him to find another guy than me because he so called requirement on guys is must have nice body and a very tall guy as same height as him. But he tell me, he does not want another guys than me because he fall in love with me and become gay also me. =.="

That was one night, he asked me, wanted to see SB's pic. At first, I feel like don't want to show him, but what the heck just pic only. Later he told me, SB got cute baby face, nice body and so on. I told him go date SB much better than me....hahahaha...I don't mind he date SB because I know SB too well and he doesn't know where SB stay plus SB don't recognized who is he either......XD

Besides that,he want to be recluse. At that moment, I was abit angry because he told all this things. I say to him, I will always love him, wont date another guys beside him then have XXX with him.......jk...XD

Whenever we start to chat, he always call me " sayang " (darling) and my nickname. Then I start to call him Babe...hahahahahah....XD. And say I love you to him also smooch with him abit. I wish I could hold his hand tight..............<3

I love you........DN

He even try to act cute pose for me (I'm the expert....;p )...hahahahahaha...but he is really cute no matter what pose he did.......XD

There were few times, he give Goodbye Kiss. At first, I feel "geli" then I start get used it and accept who he is as my current ...........guess.....XD

Goodbye Kiss........DN

to be continued.............

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

My shell has been Broken...................

2010-01-25T00:43:00.001+08:00

Haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

The whole time, i was "haiz". All because of this post, i wrote on Facebook >>

Please put this on your status if you know someone who is gay. My wish for 2010 is that people will understand that being gay is not a disease: people who are gay are not looking for a cure but for ACCEPTANCE...93% won't copy & paste this. Will you make this your status for at least one hour?

whoever add me in Facebook, you can see those comments lo..............but 13 comments.....and......i deleted one which i commented...what i wrote on that comment was (which was deleted) "I will tell you who is the guy loved if you like my post".

But then no one comment lo at that moment lo.......After that almost midnight, my cousin bro and sis called me......tell me why post that in my profile lo........I answered for fun lo and my friends also post lo then bla bla bla bla....and they asked me am i gay lo....haiz... Then I straight forward tell i need to do my revision because tomorrow (25/1/2010) got exam and this and that lo......plus im not ready for this coming out of closet lo............>.<

haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

im totally right no mood to revise my exam lo.....because my shell has been broken lo......

I will cancel the Tuesday post because like this lo....................

For now, let me take few days off to somewhere else lo.......to clear things up and my mind too.....

Haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

and I want say im sorry for my broken english in this post.......haizzz......>.<

p.s...........see you in few days

Cheer Up.....XD

2010-01-23T14:50:00.004+08:00

This week i was kind of busy because of my exams. I think broke my promised for not posting on this thrusday. Furthermore, I need to make necessary adjustment to my post and the blog. That why I set to private for few days. But then I didn't the blog template, im so lazy....hahahaha...XD

The next post, I will try make it as sexy as possible, more sugary content.

Through out the whole week, I had been Facebooking and MSN BUT I got revised my subjects because someone monitor my activities. Besides that, I gained few pound, because the whole time my butt stick on the chair and my eyes fixed on the laptop..............>.<.....hahahaha....XD.

I promised myself after exam I will do sit up and push up......hahahahaha...XD

I just had my hair cut this thursday (beh tahan lo my hair so long like that ) and I totally love it how they style my hair, also more shorter then William's hair lol........Wuahahahahaha...;p

Next Monday would be my final paper then HOLIDAY......Yahooooooooooooooooooooooo

On the other hand, I saw some bloggers very moody, may be because they missed me so much.....hahahahahahaha.....:p

So the next post would be on 26th January 2010...This I promise you.....XD

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

First ...thing...First.....XD

2010-01-12T17:31:00.004+08:00

This few weeks im really busy, because i to do my revision on my studies for this coming exam. My exam start on 16th of January 2010 and end on 25th of January 2010.

16/01/2010
>>>>Advanced Accounting Practice

18/01/2010
>>>>Taxation

20/01/2010
>>>>Performance Management

25/01/2010
>>>>Corporate Finance

All of these papers will be held on morning session because the papers are 3 hours paper.this time different compared to previous senior year, we got extra 15 minutes for reading and planning therefore our exam time start from 9am until 12:15 pm. But then, this time, the exam schedule is so hectic and so stress lol.....>.<....haiz. After the exam, I may be gonna cut my hair and still I haven't decided to cut which hair style yet. May be later I go there decide the hair style I want. And yet I still havent shop for my new year clothes. Furthermore I need to help my parent clean up the house and prepare things for the Chinese New Year.

This year, Chinese New Year and Valentine fall on the same day. I was wondering how do you all gonna celebrate your valentine with your loved ones. May be bring them to meet your parents, that would be wonderful and most memorable moment to remember.....hahahaha....XD

Anyway, he will going back to university on 18th January 2010. I'm gonna miss him so much and he said, he wont be back for Chinese New Year........haiz...>.<

By the way, I already prepared a post( hint: Taylor Swift), so I may be posted it on this Thursday or the next Thursday, see first.

Lol....Continue do my revision lol....>.<

And enjoy your weekend....hehehehe...XD

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

Things...............(^0^)

2010-01-09T18:58:00.009+08:00

These few days I am being downloading dramas and albums from forums.

The Beauty of The Game (美麗高解像)
Yesterday, I watched the final episode of The Beauty of The Game( 美麗高解像)(2009). It was a great drama and the whole episodes emphasize on women playing the jealousy game in between them of winning each other. Therefore women are most fearsome creature…....>.<..... The Season of Fate (五味人生)

Next Monday will premiere The Season of Fate (五味人生) (2010). I can’t wait to see it……
Total Episode: 25

List of Songs:

1. "Your Love Is My Drug"

2. "Tik Tok"

3. "Take It Off"

4. "Kiss n Tell"

5. "Stephen"

6. "Blah Blah Blah" (featuring 3OH!3)

7. "Hungover"

8. "Party at a Rich Dude's House"

9. "Backstabber"

10. "Blind"

11. "Dinosaur"

12. "Dancing with Tears in My Eyes"

13. "Boots & Boys"

14. "Animal"

I downloaded Kesha’s album Animal (2010). I like most of her songs especially the “Tik Tok” , but then some of her songs, especially the rhythm of the music, sound like those 80’s and 90’s video game soundtracks.

List of songs:
01. 活著
02. 雨過天陰
03. 寬限期
04. 衣帽間
05. 替你高興
06. 載我走
07. 藝妓回憶錄
08. 最後晚餐 (香港電台處境喜劇《有房出租》主題曲)
09. 身體髮膚 (屈臣氏廣告主題曲)
10. 賴床

I have downloaded Kay Tse’ s album Slowless (2009).I am being waiting for this album since I watched the Room To let (最後晚餐) (2009) mini series, the theme song is the last supper (最後晚餐). Other songs I also like from different album.

Wedding Invitation Street-囍帖街- From Binary album (2008)

Song Of The Year -年度之歌- From Yelling album (2009)

Now I can play all of these songs in my car using MP3 FM modulator transmiter ............hehehehe...XD

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

Cute DD.......<0-(^0^)0->

2010-01-06T20:53:00.003+08:00

Cute DD, I dedicated song to you and only you...........hahahahahahaha........XD

I will always love you by Whitney Houston.

If I should stay,
I would only be in your way.
So I'll go, but I know
I'll think of you ev'ry step of the way.

And I will always love you.
I will always love you.
You, my darling you. Hmm.

Bittersweet memories
that is all I'm taking with me.
So, goodbye. Please, don't cry.
We both know I'm not what you, you need.

And I will always love you.
I will always love you.

I hope life treats you kind
And I hope you have all you've dreamed of.
And I wish to you, joy and happiness.
But above all this, I wish you love.

And I will always love you.
I will always love you.
I will always love you.
I will always love you.
I will always love you.
I, I will always love you.

You, darling, I love you.
Ooh, I'll always, I'll always love you.

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

My wishing For 2010.........ll(^0^)ll

2009-12-31T22:49:00.006+08:00

This year I'm not going anywhere but at home celebrating New Year eve with family and friend. So much memories gathered in 2009, the wonderful memories and the bad memories. Nevertheless we still celebrate, even we have conflict with each other. So whatever is done , done leave it in 2009, just cherish the good and wonderful moment and memories.

I hope for next year, 2010, will be a great year. My wishing list for 2010 would be:

1.) Pass all my exam papers and courseworks also assignments

2.) Everybody's health in good condition and "Kaya raya"......

3.) Buy a new bag ( the current bag that i had been using for 6 years so it's time for a change)

4.) Buy new shoes lol......XD

5.) Buy new jeans especially those skinny jeans...hehehehehe....XD

6.) And get a boyfriend when I completed what I wanted....hehehehe..XD

That's all, gadgets may be few more years then decide to buy which one.

Anyway, enjoy your holidays and have a wonderful weekend.

>>>>>> countdown 1 <<<<<<< >>>>>> countdown 0 <<<<<<<

HAPPY NEW YEAR >>>>>> 2010

v(^0^)v
Love Me by
Nicholas

Happy......\\(^0^)//

2009-12-30T00:12:00.004+08:00

I'm so happy. I'm really so happy. I'm damn really so happy because we get to chat using webcam and microphone. His voice really sweet and sexy......XD. If he whisper beside my ear, I was like ahhhhhhahahah...... soften my whole body. He fluent mandarin like those taiwanese people and very fluent english.

He not that good in cantonese, my cantonese.....hahahahahah...XD. Sometime he sounded like SB, the way he speak. This time I get to see him longer abit. He 's a very funny, sweet guy and I laugh alot. It's joyful thing to laugh. Sometimes he very shy but I'm more shy than him.....hahahahahaha...XD. I enjoy the moment chatting with him...XD

Someone came and ask me, about him having nice body or not. I answered I don't know because he didn't show me lo.....XD.

If someone came and ask me .....are you happy now?...I would answer them, yes, Im so happy..XD....

>>>>countdown 3<<<<<<

>>>>countdown 2<<<<<<

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

First time!!!!!!!!! ......hehehehehe....XD

2009-12-28T11:37:00.002+08:00

Yesterday, we had a chat in msn, and this time he use his own lappy. I was curious and wonder why he use the lappy with webcam this time. May be he want to show me his face to me or something else. But I was happy to see his face.....hahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaha...XD

The first two times, was blur and dark, cant see at all. He purposely don't want let me see then i fake my angry emotion to him. The 3rd time, he let me see his face, and very clear this time. I look it for 2 or 3 sec then off it. Furthermore, he ask me to speak, but I don't want. I want him to speak first then my turn to speak.

When I heard he voice, I was like, O.M.G. His voice so so so sexy but he got sore throat that time and sick. I feel very guilty to ask him speak. Then is my turn, he tell my voice very sissy. I was speechless, don't know what to say. My voice very rough, so that why I softened my voice. I did heard his singing voice, very sweet .....hehehehehehehehehehehehehe......XD

He did show me some classical music. Sometimes, I will listen to them when I'm free.

I'm so so so so HAPPY...........

Sometimes, I will tell him, " If only I can love you but I can only like you"......XD

Countdown>>>>>>>4<<<<<<<<

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

Merry Christmas.......

2009-12-25T14:51:00.002+08:00

I wish everyone Merry Christmas and enjoy the celebration with your love ones, family members, boyfriend, girlfriend, and so on. Also enjoy the long long Holiday weekend .......wuahahahaha..XD

MERRY 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • •
。CHRiSTMAS 。。° 。 ° ˛ ˚ ˛
_Π_＿。 ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •˛ •˚
/__＿/ ＼。˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •˛ •˚
｜田田｜門｜ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •...

v(^0^)v
Love me by
Nicholas

Mistaken and Cannot be alter.........haiz...( Special post)

2009-12-19T16:13:00.004+08:00

I had fallen in love with a guy. But this time, the guy neither straight non gay, he is bisexual. I had definitely fall in love with him and feel kind of lost right now.....haiz..... Everyday I miss him so much, hope my classes will end so fast and quickly go home, chat with him in facebook. It's a feeling like everyday must chat with him then you only feel comfortable and calm.

Sometimes I even worry until sick, worry something happen on him, why he so late online in facebook, why this, why that, you know this kind of worrying feeling. Sometimes I just wish that he might overnight at my house, had dinner with him, send him to work or study, and take him home , so on. At least I know he is safe.

The first few day he added me as his friend in Facebook, I thought he's some older guy ( by 2 or 3 year) because of his name. We didn't have any intimate talk but a normal conversion. Furthermore, he added me as a friend because he saw my blog. As the day passed, we start to use those sweet talk, and I start to have chemistry on him. Sometime he even tell me some girls "two milky things'' and "peeing thing", I also don't how to react to this. . like this kind of guy, a funny type.

There are time, I tell myself to not fall in love with him because his sexuality and his so called "requirement" on guys. But I do always tell him, I missed him so much and he also missed me so much, I wanna express my feeling toward to him but couldn't. So I choose alternative way to express my feeling to him by post something on Facebook that related to him, so he will notice it.

But now I'm scare and worry that I'm almost six feet under, because my feeling for him more deeper and couldn't help myself up. May be I should use less sweet talk with him, a normal straight guy talk, evade him in Facebook, or delete him in Facebook. But this kind of action will hurt him and even make me more sad....haiz...

My feeling almost as same as the three songs above................

Cium!!!!....hahahahah..XD

2009-12-16T06:46:00.002+08:00

Yesterday I had chatted with 2 friends, one is gal , the other is guy. The guy is half "banana" same like me. We talk, and talk, and talk, then I ask a gal to translate for me the word "kiss" in chinese word but I want in ABC version.

The first word I can think for "kiss" in cantonese is "sack", but he couldn't understand the word "sack". So the gal sent me this chinese word but he still wouldn't understand but for me also don't what is it but in ABC version is, "wen".

So i told to the gal, the guy wouldn't understand chinese word. She ask me to use "CIUM". The first thing come to my mind for that word is, a guy with "misai" and a very very very "ham sap" too, approach you and "cium" you. (imagine he say cium and at the same coming forward to). The gal and I laughed, at the same time very "geli".......hahahahahahahaha

I prefer to use kiss - kiss on him. " Sack- sack " also can if he understand....wuahahahaha....... He may be like it. ........hahaahahha......Do you like it??? heheheh....XD

Sweet Talk!!!! ........v(^0^)v

2009-12-15T11:19:00.003+08:00

These few day, I had a chat with someone in Facebook. Not to say few days, everyday we chat. We chat everyday, sometimes I use sweet talk to the person like:

Sayang- sayang...
pretty boy...
wei-wei
boy-boy...
you so cute...
you so good looking...
you so lengzhai...
and etc......

Whenever I use sweet talk with him, I start to get horny, I rubbed my both of my to release the sexual tension. May be I should cut down those sweet talk with him....haiz

Snatch Theft!!!!! Robber!!!!!! I hate you all....>.<

2009-12-14T17:44:00.004+08:00

Today, there is a snatch theft happened outside our house.The time is around 5:30am. All I heard is a girl screaming but not screaming for help just screaming that's all. First I thought some psycho people or someone got nothing to do just fooling around.

Later, a neighbor came out and shouted at him. I quickly wake up but didn't go out and look. I heard the theft quickly speed off his motorcycle. Then this malay guy (also a neighbor) chase after him. I think they didn't successfully catch him. The girl or lady, didn't know whether her things got stolen or not. All I heard, she's crying.

snatch theft (photo credited to The Star)

This is not the first time happened around our house. There were few times in this year. If I still remember, our opposite neighbor ( neh... I told you that guy have sex with girl, their house) house, the theft to try to enter the house through the window but thanks to the next door 's dog keep barking non stop ( also no thanks to them at all because their dog disturb my beauty sleep lol .... =.=). They managed to catch the theft and tie his hand together. The theft is malay boy. He's very young, younger than me by 2 or 3 years. They whack him "gau gau" before the police arrived. My dad stopped them. I look at the boy, so young and he may had a bright future ahead but he choose this way to ruin his life.

Another also a snatch theft but this time is a car and happened outside the malay neighbor house. The guys chase after car using motorcycle but didn't manage to after them. This time the victim is a lady again and happened early in the morning.

About the snatch theft using motorcycle, we suspected is an indian man and the same guy doing this. This guy targeting the victims around our house. I cannot do anything, this is beyond my control to happen. But I hope one day, somewhere, he will get caught by someone lo......hehehehe...xD

v(^0^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

I'm so scared!!!!!!!!!!......ll(^0^)ll

2009-12-14T11:52:00.003+08:00

I don't like to see any scary movies , they will give me nightmare and sleepless night. I remember when I was young, I'm so afraid of seeing any scary or super paranormal or ghost movies, the more scarier they are, the more I'm afraid of having nightmare. My mom always tell me, if I'm scare to watch scary movies, why I'm still seeing it even though it gives nightmares and sleepless night. This is because I'm a stubborn person ( I know in malay is " keras kepala" but in english, i forgotten), you tell me not to watch, I'm still wanna to watch......hahahaha...XD

There is few times I watched scary movies alone at night while my parent was asleep, in living room. There is a movie that gives me the creeps, it is Jeepers The Creepers.

Jeepers The Creepers

This thing very ugly and at the same time very scary, it has fin come out from its head. It like to hunt and kill people. When I watched it, feels like no feeling but very disgusting when it slash or stab or cut off the body part. When the movie is over, I'm so scare to close my eyes to sleep, I'm afraid it will appear in front of me and chop off my head or my body parts. It's my mind toying with me, make me hard to sleep. But this lately, I get use to it watching scary movie wit no fear and no sense of afraid......hahahahaha

If I watch with my boyfriend, I will totally hug him until the end of the movie. ...Ahhh... so wonderful.......XD.....It is highly recommended for those new couple to spices up their relationship, choose those movies that it gives you the creep, and watch together with your boyfriend lo......hehehehehe.....XD

v(^0^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

Guys!!!! KISS!!! SEX!!!! NO WAY!!!!........Final Part

2009-12-12T19:19:00.003+08:00

This my last part of the Guys!!!! Kiss!!! Sex!!!! No way!!!!. I think this part you guys don't like the most.....haiz ....let see first...

My first kiss will always my parent and relatives, there is no doubt about it. I don't remember any of my childhood memories but I do remember my niece and nephew when they were young and had their first kiss, all their kisses went us, relatives. May be my childhood same as them. The surprising is here, may be I kissed a girl before, than a boy. Or may be both. Ahhhh....Those fragment memories, I need to defrag those memories back.

Anyway, don't bother those childhood memories, that doesn't count as my first kiss. Lets talk the thing I remembered. Last year only I celebrated my 21th birthday with families and friends. My first kiss wasn't a boy who received it but it is girls. Two girls received my first kiss. I still remember that day. I organized a small birthday party, called my friends from college and few from secondary school. After the we had our meal, we went to presents ceremony. I noticed two presents from college friends.

One is a jacket and the other is bag. The first girl had my kiss is YK, she present me the bag while the second girl had my kiss is SC with a jacket. I know they all contribute and share equally the present. They all did this because I'm very close to these girls and they even thought that these girls is my girlfriends. I can't blame them that they didn't know I'm gay, so I just closed my eye and kissed them on their cheeks. This my first kiss went to the girls. May be my first kiss on guys is on cheeks and lips .......hahahaha..XD

I never had a sex before, even with SB, we didn't have sex. He and I still virgin but now I didn't know he's still a virgin or not. I don't know how is the feel or the enjoyment of sex. Someone will say it is painful and someone will define as heaven and earth. I really don't how it feels like, someday I will find out this.

I'm not the guy to have sex so easily. I want our relationship to stable then we can talk sex unless you make me drunk, that would different story. Few months ago, I had this weird and wonderful dreams. I was having sex with this malay guy and this guy is my school friend. But not just this time, already few times with him. Why have to be him? why not someone else?....haiz. Then I stopped dreaming about him anymore.

I want to tell you something when I was in secondary school. There is this guy move in with his family to our neighbor. He younger than me by 1 year only. I don't recall when I was at that time, but I do recall a embarrassing moment about him. That time was afternoon, I guess I'm the morning class. Anyway, I was alone in home, using computer in my room then suddenly he turn his radio so loud. Our room just opposite each other. I find very noise and distracting. After a few minutes, I heard someone having sex. That guy with a girl.

I feel disgusting and this live show has been going on for 45 minutes. Don't ask me why I'm still there. The reason because I use my earphone until he stopped his music. I fell pity for them, if he got the girl pregnant, "cham lol", they will bear the whole responsibility. Why these day kids do things unthinkable and don't recognise the consequences .

The End

I hope you like it....hahahaha...;-D

I want say sorry to you guys who had difficulties understand my english. The next time i will write proper english.

v(^0^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

GUY!!! Kiss !!! Sex!!! NO WAY!!!!! ...part 2

2009-12-11T14:07:00.002+08:00

The first part is the first guy I had a crush is a teacher. Now is the second part. May be you will enjoy or don't....Let see first....hahaha..

The first guy I fall in love is SB. I'm so lazy repeat my relationship with sb and you can refer back to previous post. Before our realtionship start, I was in National Service, at that moment I didn't anyone there except one malay friend. We know each other from primary school through secondary school. I suspected he is gay but anyway don't bother about him. We were separated in groups, he in group C while I'm in group D. There I met a few guys from different regions. I saw this guy, SH. He is not that good looking but there is something so attractive about him and I instant click.

Within these 3 months training, we know each other alot and I even see him shirtless many times. We don't like to go open concept toilet where they scoop water from the big tub and others can see each other in half naked. If I go there, my "thing" went up, then "cham lo"...."paisei" "paisei". We actually went to separated toilet with a door, so we can have little privacy. We did not completely nude but we still wear underwear and take bath. I always thinking about him and fantasize of we being together. That only the first few weeks later then the I met SB at the telephone. During the last month, we all were sent out for communities services, sometimes we were back very early and sometimes very late. There is one time I missed the to join them because of that. My friend, Jackie, CH, and SH, (we all sleep in the same room) they jumped into the big tub in naked when no one around. I totally missed that beautiful occasion

Anyway, there is one time, I saw him praying to the drawer. I was shocked at that moment and not just that, every night he did it before he went to sleep. My friend told me is a japanese praying method and I didn't knew japanese praying had this, I thought they pray at shrine. Anyway, after few weeks, I accepted his prayer method, and started to get to know abit of SB. I always went to his room (SB) and lay down on his bed and face each other talk and talk. Sometimes he isn't there, I wait at his bed . He very seldom come to my room. I'm not like Simonlover and Horny BF have sex. Anyway, SH start to notice I'm gay and distance himself from me because SBand I. Actually SH is straight. He always talk about chicks that, chicks this, how beautiful they are, how beautiful these.

There was one day , we at canteen and that time was night about 8 pm t0 9pm something. He ask me this:

SB: Nic, who do you think is the good looking guy????
Nic: I think is.................SH "gua"
SB: SH, lengzhai meh!!!!........
Nic: Then who??
SB: You la!!!!!!
Nic: Me!!!!!! I'm not that lengzhai.....other people more lengzhai then me.....
SB: No!! You more lengzhai then them lo....
Nic:*Blushing......hahahaha....

I'm totally blushing at that moment, can't think a word to say. Sometimes I think it's for unfair to SB because I fall in love with SB but keep thinking of SH. SB didn't know I was thinking about him whole time and I didn't tell him this. There were quite some time I missed him and SH when we all separated into groups again for communities services. SB and I didn't hold each other hand before, until the day we went our own on separate ways.

For SH, we seldom see each other and only once we went out to shopping with other friends. From that moment we didn't see each other, even though i still texting him but lately he changed his phone number.

Later, may be post the kissing and sex as the final part.....hahahaha...XD

v(^o^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

GUY!!! Kiss !!! Sex!!! NO WAY!!!!! ....part 1

2009-12-10T16:33:00.004+08:00

When I was 11 years old, the first guy I had a crush on is a teacher. He is not a chinese teacher but a malay teacher and he is our class teacher. I still remember he teaches us mathematics and along the way I failed his subject. Not because he didn't teach well but it is I not concentrating on his teaching because I was gazing his small butt. I always sit at the back roll of the class, whenever he turn his back on me, I look at his bottom......hahahaha....

At that age, I was young, naive and innocent. I didn't know anything about sex thing or sex term even gay. He stay in a flat with other male teachers and few blocks away from the school while I'm stay quite near the primary school and secondary school. He's not that tall but he's quite a good looking guy. At that time, a malay girl beside. We always talk in class and one day I told her:

N: tengok-tengok buntut dia>>>>( see his butt) (my teacher)
A: ya.. ..>>>> (yes)
N: sangat kecil.....>>>( so small)
A: ya....sangat kecil...>>>(yes, so small)
N: awak rasa cantikkah???...>>> ( do you think is beautiful???)
A:tengok dulu.....cantik juga......ahhh.....Nicholas ini ah.....>>>( see first...also beautiful ...)
N: hahahahahaha......

They didnt know I was gay at that time because we all very naive. I always thinking about wherever I go. Sometimes I will spy his house, see him whenever i walked by pass because there is a small supermarket. I always dream want to " sleep " with him and that time I discovered that "thing" ( same like Evan's blog). From that moment I had a habit of doing that "thing" whenever I miss him and want to do that with him.

I like him wear office suit so can see he curvy body especially his bottom. I always gazed alot male teachers bottom but my teacher is the best. After standard 5, he is not my class teacher for standard 6. I always looking and searching for him outside the class before the teachers entered. By now, he's in mid of 30's something.

This only the first part.....second part later......hehehe..XD

Guys... Do you see today sunset???
Today sunset exactly like a " ham tan".....so beautiful.....

v(^o^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

Drunk!!!!!.....>.<

2009-12-08T09:20:00.002+08:00

My little sister friend, again she drunk. She bought those alcohol drinks to our house to drunk herself again. She is a very messy person, dress like a boy. Actually I almost mistaken her as boy. Really.

Anyway, my parent dislike her so much. There are few times, she didn't flush the toilet and I was the one to flush it. Disgusting. IF she vomit on our floor, I will scoop back and put back to her mouth and let her swallow. Feel those disgusting thing running through her throat....wuahahahaha....XD. I hope my boyfriend wouldn't not do that to me. But I will carry him home and stripped him off , put him into bed. I wouldn't take advantage on him when he is drunk. I' m good guy right???...XD

Actually I can easily get drunk,I drink 2 can of 5% alcohol and I knock out. That's why I didn't drink beer or any alcoholic drinks. I was wondering, when I get drunk, are you willing to carry me home? and stripped me off to bed??? not like the Eternal Summer movie (2006)

I worry when I'm drunk, blah, blah, blah many things that I shouldn't tell...wuahahahah....

Today very "cham" (pity). Class from 12:30pm to 8pm lol. And CF assignment haven't finish yet....cham.. cham..chan...

Guys do you know where can I find this song>>最後晚餐 ( Last Dinner) - by Kay Tse<>Rooms to Let (有房出租)<<

v(^o^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

Simple Minded!!!!!!

2009-12-07T09:29:00.002+08:00

Human are very complex structure and with many intention while animals have only one intention, that is to survive. Do you know what God gave us one thing that animals don't have? and Do you know the causes of these? These questions I let you think.

Do you read Doraemon? The creator of Doraemon, Fujiko F. Fujio, do you think he is simple minded person, or creative person ? In my opinion, he is both. In simple minded way, where he gives people hopes, believes and laughter, in the way he present his stories. In creative way, he gives wonderful and innovation idea that the future might be like his stories, go back in time, go into the future, visit out of space, and etc.

Sometimes you sit a round table, face each other and observe them. You might think these people very simple minded and idiotic people. You might be true or wrong. By the way, most of my friends say I'm so "geng" predicting them. Actually I observe them and analyse their expression, it's like using a bit analytical thinking. I'm writing this post, need to think for 2 or 3 hours to come out with ideas until here.......May be I stopped until here. Im still thinking the title right for this post or not....haiz

Try to listen to this song.

v(^o^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

Eating Out : Eat All You Can (2009) !!!!!!

2009-12-06T17:24:00.005+08:00

I just finished download Eating Out : Eat All You Can (2009). This movie is sequel from Eating Out (2004) and Eating Out 2: Sloppy Seconds (2006). I find this movie hilarious and very loving story. In this movie, the hot guy is Chris Salvatore and John Stallings ( Janice Dickson Modeling Agency and Manhunt). But I like Chris Salvatore more than John Stallings. I find he very attractive and cute too especially the eyes....yeahhhhhh...XD

Chris Salvatore

The movie review is here
The Download Link is here

Enjoy!!!!!!!!

v(^0^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

Reaction!!!!!!

2009-12-06T10:05:00.002+08:00

Yesterday my parent, sister and I went Bukit Bintang to have dinner but actually at Lot 10. My mom and sister get RM200 voucher when signed something ( I forget what is it), and each person entitled for RM 100 voucher.

When we went there, the LG floor changed alot compared to last time. For quite some time I didn't go Lot 10. The design was great but very confusing, it 's like a maze inside, may be those glass effect. Let's not talk this craps, my purpose going there is have dinner and see leng zhai ( handsome or pretty man ). At there I saw few leng zhai, the one that caught my attention is a guy wearing a pink colar T-shirt and short pant.

In my mind, he is cute and he 's the type of guy i wanna to date. I do not know how to define he looks but in my opinion, he's very very cute. The first time I look at guys is the eyes then the other parts. His eyes were very attractive. I saw him holding a tray with a plate chopped " Yau Char Kwai", I think for dessert. Furthermore, he was alone.

When we found seats, he still looking for a seat. After my dad and I ordered pork knuckle and sausages, I walked and look around for food, I saw him still searching for seat. He so "cham" ( pity). Then I saw an empty seat, he also did.

While I was eating and looking for "leng zhai", I saw him again......haiz. I don't want to put so much hope on that guy then suddenly turn out like Raul.

That day, the food court so crowded. The people at there like they just release from prison.....haiz.....Anyway I don't want to talk about them. After the dinner, we walked to Pavilion, same thing happen again....haiz........

We went to see christmas decoration and looking for "leng zhai" at same time. Pavilion definitely a gay breeding ground. My dad abit unpleasant when he saw this. I do not know my dad react when I say my gay.......haiz.........Anyway we didn't shop but went to buy J.Co donuts and have Starbucks coffee. I saw a leng zhai doing homework at Starbucks. I think he is gay. Another one is next table only. I saw him talking to woman and turn his head few time also glimpse me abit. This guy also very good looking.

But in my heart still thinking about that guy in pink and SB........haiz

Tired and Crazy!!!!!!!....(e.e)

2009-12-05T09:26:00.005+08:00

These few days i was very tired and abit not myself. May be all because the stresses of doing the courseworks. The whole weeks I was listening to Lady Gaga - The Fame Monster album 's songs over and over again also some chinese songs. I turn on 50% volume with two speakers, I think pretty loud and there is base speaker next to my laptop. Even driving, I constant listen to Lady Gaga's songs. OMG!!!! I had been hypnotized by Lady Gaga's songs......cham lol(empathy)....hehehe.....XD

I still have two coursework haven't start yet. One is Corporate Finance that need to pass up next Thursday and Taxation on 24 of December 2009, christmas eve day. The Tax, we have answers from senior, so don't need to worry, but the problem is CF.

ahhhhhhh..... so stressssssssssss......... yehhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......WTF............

But I got him beside me...Davey Wavey .......He is cute, sexy and shirtless all the time.......wuahahahahahaaha.......XD

Visit his blog>>>break the illusion<<<

v(^0^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

Friends!!!!!!

2009-12-03T18:26:00.006+08:00

Today we manage to finish one out of three courseworks . Thanks to our coursework groupmate' s friend done it for us. I don't even know how his friend manage to do it, even we scratching our heads, thinking for so long and asking "WTF" is question stating about, we still can't do it, don't where to start, how to calculate and etc. By the way, is Performance Management (PM) coursework we completed. All I can say is his friend's so "geng" (an expression stating that person done extraordinary thing then a ordinary person). Luckily we consult the PM tutor and ask his confirmation on our assignment. He said most is correct, I

After we done the assignment, we talk, talk, talk then suddenly came across to this so called "Friends" topic. Whatever they said is true. Some of them restricted certain information to share with us when doing these group assignments. My presumption may be because they envy certain group done better than them by helping the other groups.

When I was in Diploma, we helped each other alot in assignment and we not calculative person. But the current Advance Diploma group friends, most of them very calculative, some don't. "Some" very helpful and assist you to finish your assignment. The "most" will just tell what is that, what is this and etc. They never guide you but in tutorial is different.

My Diploma friends very outstanding and supporting persons. I missed them alot........haiz. The "most" look very knowledgeable but very narrow minded people. Furthermore they didn't look further ahead but short distance and keep certain things to themselves.

When we do assignment, we do in cooperative way in group rather than separated the work or task to each other. I want the members to understand what are we doing and heading to, even though group task alot chit chatting, gossiping, talks around and not doing assignment, will not be able finish it. But sharing information is better because certain people might provide information that is very useful and comparable to others.

Friends supposed to help and support each other no matter when, where or how. I still believe the "most" will change towards each other.....haiz..

FRIENDS!!!
FRIENDS!!!
FRIENDS!!!
FRIENDS!!!
FRIENDS!!!
When you gonna realize????

v(^o^)v
Love me by:
Nicholas

I forget to tell you guys....
Favorite word : Bloody Hell ..............hahahaha....XD

Newbie!!!! Part 2......v(^o^)v

2009-12-01T08:23:00.003+08:00

This the second part of me....hehehehe... may be alot 18sx...wuahahaha...XD

Height : you think la.......hehehe...XD
Weight: I didn't weight so long time lo.....XD
Course : Accounting....
Ambition : Designer, @ Chef, @ IT Professional...
Hobbies : Online, @ Shopping ( if got $ and I'm a shopaholic....hehe..).....
What Gadgets you have now : Nokia Phone, ...@ MP3, .. @ Laptop ( my beloved Laptop,
Muackkk)
Favorite Colour for T-Shirt: Black....
Favorite Singers (Western) : Whitney Houston and Celine Dion......
Favorite Songs : I will always love you - Whitney Houston.....@ Because you Loved me - Celine Dion........@Breakaway - Kelly Clarkson....(sb)
Favorite Singer (Asian) : Sammi Cheng.......All hailed to Sammi Cheng, The Queen Of Pop....lol...^o^
Favorite gay theme series: Queer as Folk
Favorite series: Grey' Anatomy....@...Friends....@ ....Heroes...(milo ventimiglia is cute)..hahah...
First gay movie : Latter Days.....Steve Sandvoss is so cute and innocent at that time lol....XD
Favorite gay theme Song: @Windmills - Toad The Wet Sprocket.....(Latter Days)
Full Collection: One Piece Movies .........but lend to someone haven't return yet.....kill him ....XD
Top or Bottom: May be both ma.....hahahah.. ...
Front or Back: Both ma.....hehehehe.......XD
One Thing you cant live without it: Hair Gel......wuahahaha...
Favorite Car: Opel ( currently I'm driving).....hoho....
Do fantasize guys when they walk by pass you: No.....
Have Been to any camp before: Yeah ....NS...
Do you cook: Yes abit lol..........
What type of guys you like : Someone who love me and i love him lol.... we both like to argue lol...... we care each other when either of us is down......( almost same as sb)........
what would you do when you have own house: first party... then my friends gone home... leave me and him lol.... intimate section lol......hoho...XD
What guys you prefer : Someone same age as me or older than me 1 or 2 year lol.... young guys still under consideration...wuahahaha...XD
When you gonna have first sex: When our relationship is stable lo.........
What do hope for next year: May be changes in relationship in Facebook from It's complicated to Relationship with "someone" lo.....
Do sex important to you: Yes but this is second in my list... the first is caring the someone you loved far more important.....heheh..XD

Yesterday, I had discussion on library until 3:30pm. We went to canteen to have lunch because some of us had breakfast only. When we were searching for place to sit, I saw Raul at a far distance, and he also saw me. I pretended looking around for place. I found a bench under the fan. We sit at front rightside and he is in middle center surrounded by girls. I did glimpsed he alot. I asked a friend an opinion about Raul. She said Raul abit arrogant. Then I think to myself, she is right.

So we went to lecture after we had our meals. I saw Lee CH wear a pink T-shirt and long jeans. Actually I don't like he wear pink ,personally I found he not that attractive. During 10 minutes, I didn't saw Raul and Lee CH. They must went back home.... haiz....

Nicky at Spot.

I am Silly

Innocent part 2 ?

All in one.

Pathetic.

Share.

The reason

Ah Wong

My Top List

The hint.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year 2011

Im still standing

Shout!!!!

Innocent.

Why am I so Stubborn?

Expect the unexpected

The meet up .o( *___* )o

The sorrowfulness

Do it first, regret later.

Embarrassing Moment...:D

3 wise Monkey

Me Becoming Bisexual

Smoking

Stupid I am

My Drug.

Ouch*

Sex...:P

Examine

Jerk

Shooting Stars

I wish it wasn't True

The Egg

Bear Bear

June

Subang Boy

Emails....XD

I wish.....

LOL= Laugh Out Loud

Hot!!!!!! Hot!!!!!!! Hot!!!!!....

Do you think it will last??.................

First Love.....................

The other guy......(/^0^)/

2 birds injured badly....(o-o)

Got Angpao!!!!!! No Rose Bouquet!!!!

CNY and Val.......

Uncertainty.......@.@

Love Story....v( ^0^)//

My shell has been Broken...................

Please put this on your status if you know someone who is gay. My wish for 2010 is that people will understand that being gay is not a disease: people who are gay are not looking for a cure but for ACCEPTANCE...93% won't copy & paste this. Will you make this your status for at least one hour?

Cheer Up.....XD

First ...thing...First.....XD

Things...............(^0^)

Cute DD.......<0-(^0^)0->

My wishing For 2010.........ll(^0^)ll

Happy......\\(^0^)//

First time!!!!!!!!! ......hehehehehe....XD

Merry Christmas.......

MERRY 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • •。CHRiSTMAS 。 。° 。 ° ˛ ˚ ˛_Π___＿ 。 ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •˛ •˚/____＿/ ＼。˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •˛ •˚｜ 田田｜門｜ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •...

Mistaken and Cannot be alter.........haiz...( Special post)

Cium!!!!....hahahahah..XD

Sweet Talk!!!! ........v(^0^)v

Snatch Theft!!!!! Robber!!!!!! I hate you all....>.<

I'm so scared!!!!!!!!!!......ll(^0^)ll

Guys!!!! KISS!!! SEX!!!! NO WAY!!!!........Final Part

GUY!!! Kiss !!! Sex!!! NO WAY!!!!! ...part 2

GUY!!! Kiss !!! Sex!!! NO WAY!!!!! ....part 1

Drunk!!!!!.....>.<

Simple Minded!!!!!!

Eating Out : Eat All You Can (2009) !!!!!!

Reaction!!!!!!

Tired and Crazy!!!!!!!....(e.e)

Friends!!!!!!

Newbie!!!! Part 2......v(^o^)v

The meet up .o( ___ )o

MERRY 。 • ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ • •
。CHRiSTMAS 。。° 。 ° ˛ ˚ ˛
_Π_＿。 ˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •˛ •˚
/__＿/ ＼。˚ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •˛ •˚
｜田田｜門｜ ˚ ˛ ˚ ˛ •...